


Go to bed

by marbll_anxsui



Series: triplane stuff (not the actual thing) [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Loss of Parent(s), or mention of at least, there is an implied sort of thing here but that aint important
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:02:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21803398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marbll_anxsui/pseuds/marbll_anxsui
Summary: Gerard Pae wakes up, plagued by a nightmare.Where it gets him, he's not sure.
Series: triplane stuff (not the actual thing) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1571158
Kudos: 1





	Go to bed

Gerard Pae, growing up after the ill fate of his mother, always had to deal with his father waking up in the middle of the night. His father would often wake up, drink himself into a stupor, and cry uncontrollably, as that was his only way of coping.

Gerard’s father never did this intentionally, or resorted to hurting Gerard or others. He’d wake up at random times and the cycle would repeat.

But it would always wake Gerard up. And he grew accustomed to it. Used to the cycle of waking up, finding his father crying over his mother, comforting him best he could, and sending him back to bed. It usually worked. There were only a few occurrences when it’d get worse, Gerard would start crying too, or his father wouldn’t fall back asleep and continue crying, telling Gerard about memories of times before him, and times Gerard wouldn’t have remembered.

He couldn’t imagine how his father was doing now, after he’d been dead for three years and on a completely different plane of existence. Another loved one gone. Nobody to help his father through this. It hadn’t really gotten to him until he’d woken up in a cold sweat from a dream. A familiar dream that had every sense and emotion from a memory to it.

The memory of his own death. Transported back to the small convenience store. The smell of nothing. The sudden burst of wind in the store. The shouting. The look of the gun. The fear that pulled at Gerard’s vocal chords. The sound of the gunshot. The smell--the _feeling_ of his own blood.

He’d started to shake--is this what his father felt when he woke up in the middle of the night? He clutched his chest, and then almost instinctively his hand moved down to the place where he’d gotten shot. It was as if there was blood there, but there was no blood coming out.

Shakily, he pushed himself up off of his back. Out of his bed. Forced himself to stumble out of his room. To crumble into the bathroom, lights still off, on his knees. He didn’t know what he was doing. He didn’t know what he was _going to do_ . Tears started to come out of his eyes. He couldn’t cry out--no matter how much he wanted to. He didn’t want to wake up anyone else in the house. Not Lukas. Not Jack. _Not Alexander._

He clutched his chest again. Doubled over. He wasn’t hurt, not physically, but something just made him want to double over and cry like an infant.

And a door opened. Footsteps. Gerard didn’t care. He did care, but he wanted to feel like he didn’t.

“Gerard, oh god,” the voice was familiar. He couldn’t pin it down though. Hands gripped his shoulders from behind, and he was jerked backwards, into someone’s arms, “is everything okay? Please tell me if everything’s okay or not.”

Gerard’s eyes widened. He couldn’t see who it was, they were behind him. But he knew.

It was Alexander. He and Jack had the same voice, but the one way Gerard could differentiate the two by voice alone is that Jack usually wouldn’t beg to know if he was okay in a situation like this.

Gerard put his face in his hands. The tears wouldn’t stop coming and he wouldn’t stop choking on them.

“I… no.” He managed.

“Do you need help getting back to your room?” Alexander’s arms released from around him. Gerard scrambled to get up.

“I… not really, but I’d like it.” Gerard mumbled, turning toward the other man. His tears were flowing a lot less violently now, but they were still there. Alexander drifted up, wrapping his hand around Gerard’s.

“C’mere. I’ve got you.” Alexander adjusted himself so that he and Gerard could walk together, and Alexander could give proper support.

They walked. From the bathroom to Gerard’s room. Gerard went in and sat down on his bed and, just as Alexander was about to turn around, he said “Alexander.”

Alexander froze, only to take one step into Gerard’s room. “What’cha need?”

“I.. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… but I had a dream of my death and--”

“Say no more. Can I offer some advice?” Alexander asked, walking further into Gerard’s room until he was standing in front of his place on the bed.

“What?”

Alexander leaned down, wiping Gerard’s few still-running tears off of his face. His face was gentle. Calm. 

“Go to bed, Gerard. See how you feel in the morning.”


End file.
